Thursday, May 31, 2012

The Worst Week Ever

My week started out on a fairly good tone...until Wednesday hit. I woke as usual, however, as the day progressed, it only seemed to get worse.

I have had a computer melt down. The tower of my computer system (and I use that term loosely) just shut down and I couldn't get it to come back on no matter what I did. The panic started to settle in at this point, but it was only a small case of panic. You see...ALL of my writing was in the computer, with no backup system. I called my wonderful sister who is more computer savvy than I am, and I did the things she told me to do, to no avail. Nothing worked. Today I took my tower to Office Depot, because one of my friends called me and told me that they now offered a check-up on PC's. Well here I go tromping into Office Depot with my tower and an extra power supply, hoping and praying that they could at the very least retrieve the files on my hard drive if not fix the entire problem. The person, who took my tower in for me, was a wonderful man by the name of Tony Chow. He opened the side of the computer and proceeded to tell me that immediately he found that I had at least 10 of my capacitors on my motherboard were blown. That's when the tears started it fill my eyes. He looked for a replacement online, and found NONE. He told me that it would probably be cheaper for me to buy a new computer, than it would for me to buy a new motherboard of this type anyway. At this point the tears got larger and spilled forth from my eyes beyond control. He asked me to wait a minute while he left to the back of the store. He brought back a little piece of equipment and told me he would be able to get the information off the hard drive and had me buy a flash drive to put it on. While in the process of trying to transfer the files, he kept getting messages telling him that he didn't have permission to look at the files. By now, Hoover Dam couldn't have held back the tears that fell from my eyes. I was shaking, and worry like I had never felt before, covered me like a dark cloud that refused to dissipate. Mr. Chow finally told me that he had better software at home to deal with this, and asked if it would be ok for him to take my computer home with him. At this point, I told him he could take it to the South Pole if it would help to retrieve the data I need from the hard drive.

On top of this, I have worry over my father who is in the hospital in Minnesota at the Mayo Clinic awaiting test results and a big surgery on Tuesday next week. I know that I have the faith that he will pull through this, and jump this horrible hurdle that has been placed before him, but the worry is there anyway. I have more people than I can count praying for my father and mother as they go through this ordeal. I wish I could be there if for no other reason than to sit with my mother while she waits for the tests to be done and through the surgery on Tuesday.

Now, with all that and all this stress and worry that I am dealing with, all I could think about is how things were not going as I would like. With all that I am suffering over the possibility of losing ALL my books information, and all that could happen with my father, my eyes were opened to something tonight that had a profound effect on me. The suffering that I have done over the notion that I might lose my publishing contract if I can't get my information from the computer hard drive...well frankly...with the exception of what my father is going through, it is all MINOR, it truly is nothing. I can get another computer, and I can redo my edits, though it will take time. BUT, the event that opened my eyes showed me that no matter what, everything else really is just minor.

You see, I attended the wake of a young man tonight; a young man whose life was cut short because of an infection that went systemic throughout his body. This infection was able to do that because him immune system was already low due to Leukemia which was killing him as well. He was extended family to a very dear set of friends I have who live a short distance down the road from me. I attended this wake tonight in a church. I am not a particularly religious person and I don't actually attend church. I attended this wake to be there as support for my friends, Barry and Oneida Toppins. They cared for this young man when even his family wouldn't. They loved him like family and he loved to come to our home for our Bar-B-Q's so that he could eat my husband’s cole slaw. He was a wonderful young man, very pleasant, nice and he loved life, even when he was suffering. You see, Leukemia isn't a painless way to die, and I am sure that the infection wasn't something that would have been painless either. Scottie will be sorely missed by everyone. The pastor at the wake/viewing for Scottie tonight is who opened my eyes. He mentioned the fact that he knew, and really everyone knew that Scottie suffered, yet he never let it get him down, he NEVER complained. Scottie is a peace now, he doesn't hurt anymore and I can see him sitting at a picnic table having a Bar-B-Q with Jesus, that's just how Scottie was. He helped others, and he was always smiling, even when he hurt. If Scottie cannot complain throughout his suffering, then what right do I have to complain when I suffer a loss as insignificant as a computer? It is a lesson learned; I will be making a purchase of a flash drive to help me save my information from now on.

Rest in Peace Scottie, you will be missed.

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